Fifteen years ago, I set out to write a book about dating. Not because I had any grand insight into romance, but because I was fascinated by the mechanics of human connection: the preparation, the anticipation, the conversation, the spark, or the absence of it. But as I started writing, I realised it wasn’t a book about love, it was a book about business and, more specifically, a book about mergers and acquisitions.

In my role as CEO of Pottinger – a corporate advisory firm focused on both strategy and M&A – I’ve lived the highs and lows of many transactions, some consummated, some not. I’ve learned that the dynamics that shape a successful date can also help close business deals.

Ten years ago, I was sitting alone late at night in my office, wondering what to do with my career. I had been working in law for years and decided to write a simple list: the things I liked about being an M&A lawyer, and the things I didn’t. The second list was longer.

It frustrated me how little of my job was about helping people make business decisions – and how much was about debating detail that often didn’t matter in the end. Well, at least not as far as I could tell. This wasn’t (and isn’t) a reflection on the value of lawyers. After all, the legal profession gave me my start in professional services, and I will always be grateful to the firms that took a bet on me – a guy who wrote about coffee table books for his English thesis at university, rather than studying commerce or doing extra commercial law modules.

That night made something clear: I wanted to be in the room for the big decisions, not just framing them or tidying them up. Like many lawyers considering an exit ramp, two pathways were most logical: strategy consulting or investment banking. So, selfishly (or by accident – it was quite late), I Googled ‘strategy consulting and investment banking’. I clicked on a link for a website and there was a list of businesses that proclaimed to do both. Pottinger was a name on that list.